This shortest day is time to remember what we've done

    It’s the solstice. It’s the shortest day, less time to do things. Or perhaps a longer period of rest. Do you look forward to the return of the sun? Do you look forward to resting?

     My day started by waiting for a tow truck to take my car away… after we had just fixed its transmission. I certainly didn’t want to have that happen, wondering what may be wrong with the transmission now, days later. I came inside to scramble and figure out how to pay for the next installment of the reality show that is my life. Yet really, I just had to take time to relax and look inward. What use was it to fret, to react to the facts in that way?

    So I looked inward.

    Have you questioned your mood or wondered what it was all for? Have you taken account of what you’ve accomplished? If you haven’t yet, go ahead and do it now. 

     Look at your year in retrospect. What have you accomplished? What have you worked through or learned? These are things that are worth celebrating, worth being pleased for yourself.

     Suddenly, all the loans that really weren’t panning out because, for varied and sorted reasons, my credit isn’t so hot right now. Borrowing money from a friend with collateral was a much better idea, and was a better reward for me. Being in a good headspace gives us a clearer mind to think. Sometimes we don’t want to think about things when we feel it’s a time to celebrate. We may avoid them or we may get more upset because we have to think about them, but the fact is that we can think about them without getting upset and it goes much faster and easier. The only one who gets hurt by being upset is us. The ones who get hurt when we act upset are those around us and that ends up hurting us as well.

     I’m grateful for this mood, for my ability to introspect, and notice what is really the focus and not react to it. It gives me more time to appreciate the holiday. It’ll be good to see my friend, too.

     My mood was challenged later. I waited for a chap before playing a holiday game with my son. The man said he’d be along quickly to pick up a tire I was selling, but I waited a long time. In the meantime, I called the garage. I need a new transmission. Another $12,000 plus labor.

     This was a possible mood derailment in the making.

     “Son, the car is totaled.” 

     “Better call a family meeting on Zoom. I’ll set up the Zoom.”

     “Ok. The guy is late anyway. I’ll tell them to go on Zoom. I still haven’t gone to the bathroom.” 

     I felt pretty calm and non-reactive for the Zoom meeting to discuss the holiday plan snafu and general vehicle malaise of the moment. The lemon car. Certainly, I was disappointed. I acted and thought with patience, got off the Zoom call, and waited longer for the tire guy. 

     By the time he arrived, it was time for a nap. Mental exhaustion can common quickly. Do you give yourself grace or give yourself a hard time, or simply caffeinate your way to victory over exhaustion? If you are mentally exhausted, you won’t be productive or have fun anyway. Hydrate and take a mental break. Meditate, walk, or nap. Even two minutes to listen to your breath and feel your chest rise and fall can be a relief. Listen to your inner self.

     So I napped. Game time moved back from afternoon to evening. Game time was cut short. 

     Tomorrow is a hellacious windstorm that I don’t need to drive through. I think it’ll be another game day, and make some cookies. I can make cookies from what I have available since I’m short on groceries and don’t have a car to get them.

     A family member is trying to get a rental car for us to get to Christmas. I'm improving at receiving help.

     How have you expanded yourself this year? Let me know in the comments.

      See you next week.